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Letters show older moms aren't new

Catherine McDiarmid-Watt | Monday, January 25, 2021 | 6 comments

Image: An old lady smiles on a whale watching trip, Reykjavík, Iceland, by Silvia Cosimini, on FreeImages

November 10, 1992 --- DEAR ABBY:
This is for Found Love Late who wonders if she's too old to have a child in her mid-40s:

I was 45 and my husband was 50 when I became pregnant. We had been childless for 22 years and it was a great shock, to put it mildly. My doctor assured me that my age was no problem because my health was excellent.

I had an uneventful and easy pregnancy and was thrilled when I delivered a beautiful baby girl.

We had some adjustments to make to our lifestyle, but we handled them well.

Chris has been the joy of my life. She is 32 years old now, happily married and has given me four beautiful grandchildren.

I am now a widow - 78 years young.

Is it fair for a child to have a menopausal mom? I will let my daughter answer that question. I'm enclosing her letter...

DEAR ABBY: My mother gave me an assignment I am accepting happily.

She asked me what it was like having a menopausal mother. I never knew I had one. I suppose most kids think their parents are "old" - but I never thought mine was any older than the rest.

In fact, I always thought my parents were pretty cool - especially my mom. She was always up on the latest fashions, styles, and trends, and she dressed accordingly. (She still does.)

My mom is my best friend. We talk on the phone every day and get together at least once a week to go shopping. She can run circles around me. I have to ask her to stop so I can rest.

I want to tell those women who found love late and had children later than most women:

Don't worry about looking like a grandmother at PTA meetings. You will see women of all ages, shapes, sizes, and colors there. Lots of moms are
also grandmothers from their older children. Besides, with today's lifestyles, many children are being raised by their grandparents, so I
doubt that you will be the oldest mother there.

But most of all, please don't worry about what your children might think about having an older mom. I had one, and it never even crossed my mind at the time. I had the most wonderful childhood a kid could have, and the best parents in the world and your children will probably think the same.


This Pregnancy Over 40 story was found on Google News
Read more: Letters show older moms aren't new
Originally posted on November 10, 1992.

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About Catherine: I am mom to three grown sons, two grandchildren and two rescue dogs. After years of raising my boys as a single mom, I remarried a wonderful man who had never had a child of his own. Unexpectedly, I found myself pregnant at 49!
Sadly we lost our precious baby at 8 weeks, and decided to try again. Five more losses, turned down for donor egg, foster care and adoption due to my age and losses - we have accepted there will be no more babies in our house.

Find Catherine on Facebook - Follow me on Twitter


  1. Catherine says:

    Thank you for sharing your wonderful experience, reading your story gave me enjoyment and hope for the future!

  2. LAT says:

    What a lovely story of encouragement! Thank you for sharing.

  3. Anonymous says:

    Very helpful:) I have two older daughters 21 & 19 and also a 4yr old boy. I also have a 3 yr old grandson. The latest shock, I think I am pregnant at 45, very afraid to even test.

  4. I am constantly inspired by stories like yours. I had my first child at 45 and am considering trying to have another now at 46. It's wonderful to have hope. You can read about my story at

  5. Anonymous says:

    I got pregnant at 44, after taking chinese herbs. I had my little Sammy at 45. He's perfectly healthy! He'll be a year old in a week. It's been a wonderful journey. I checked this site a lot when we were TTC. It CAN happen!

  6. Anonymous says:

    Thank you all for sharing your stories. They are very encouraging; inspiration in the midst of so many naysayers & ART enthusiasts.

Don't just sit there, reading this story or article - say something! Do you believe it? Do you think it is impossible? Do you wish it was you? Do you have a story to share (it might get published!)

NOTE: Comments are moderated - just to stop the spambots - and so may take up to a few hours to be approved.

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