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My friend's mom had him at 45

Catherine McDiarmid-Watt | Sunday, February 10, 2008 | 2 comments

My friend's husband's mom had him when she was 45. She asked him when they got married, if he was worried about TTC [trying to conceive], since she was already past 40, and his reply was "no, my mom had me at 45".

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How about that new over 40 pregnancy post...." just got married...wasn't TTA [trying to avoid] ... just took prenatal vitamins and after 2nd month pregnant at 45"....


I almost fell out of my chair. These posts do exist.

My friend Mary, who is brilliant and born when her mom was 45, would love to hear that it can't happen

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By the way, for what it's worth in this conversation: My very good friend (who didn't know what her FSH [follicle stimulating hormone] was) had an unplanned pregnancy at 44, and delivered her son at 45.


I know that doesn't necessarily resonate with some of us here (she might not have had high FSH, and she did have other children many years previously -- her son is 16 years younger than his closest in age sister, and she wasn't struggling with TTC [trying to conceive] ), but just wanted to share my friend's experience to show that the anon poster's choice of analogy is not "realistic."

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My 45 year old friend is happily expecting her first, after giving up on fertility treatments.


My husband's first cousin had one at 44, and another at 45, which was a surprise. They thought she was too old too get pregnant, so they didn't use birth control and voila!

My father told me about his own aunt who had a baby at 51 in Italy. This was a loooog time ago as my father is 80 years old. So there was no chance "in hell" that it was DE [donor egg].

The fact is before there was birth control and things like tubal ligation, women routinely gave birth into their 40's and no one batted an eye. The birth rate for women in their 40's went down as soon as birth control became available. There is a direct correlation.

What is different now is that women have their first in their 40's, whereas long ago they would be having their 10th. That is the only difference.

But from what I've read there is no difference in fertility among women who have vs. women who have not had children before. I think the reason people make such a big deal about age now, is that there was such a long period of time when the birth rate for women in their 40's was low - because that was their choice. So people weren't use to the idea anymore.

Then you have the RE's [reproductive endocrinologist] beating us down with their statistics too. A long time ago women didn't worry or think about statistics -they were too busy having babies!

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56 year old pregnancy/delivered successfully - Just to let all you hopefuls out there that this does happen. Women can frequently become pregnant after 40's and 50's, but don't usually sustain pregnancy due to lack of hormones and health related complications such as blood pressure problems, etc.


When there is a problem with menses, often the OB/gyn [Obstetrician/Gynecologist] gives progesterone to promote sloughing of the lining of the uterus; this may also slough off an early embryo.

Being a nurse, I never assume anymore that a woman over 50 isn't pregnant, as the last call I received was from a 56 year old woman, who sustained a pregnancy unassisted in any way.

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Catherine

About Catherine: I am mom to three grown sons, two grandchildren and two rescue dogs. After years of raising my boys as a single mom, I remarried a wonderful man who had never had a child of his own. Unexpectedly, I found myself pregnant at 49!
Sadly we lost that precious baby at 8 weeks, and decided to try again. Five more losses, turned down for donor egg, foster care and adoption due to my age and losses - we have accepted that there will be no more babies in our house.

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2 comments

  1. Anonymous says:

    It is so wonderful and encouraging to read about all these ladies. I am 45 and trying for the first time. Very nervous and trying to do all the right things. It does lift my hopes to know about all these wonderful "old mother". Thank you all.

  2. Kathy says:

    I turned 45 in February, and I gave birth naturally to a baby girl in April of this year. I had my two other girls after the age of 45. I hadn't been on birth control for over 6 years, and she was a blessing in disguise.

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