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I'm pregnant & scared to death at 44

Catherine McDiarmid-Watt | Thursday, December 17, 2020 | 11 comments

Image: Do What Now?, by Nate Grigg, on Flickr

Hi! My name is Robin, and I just found out on Saturday that I'm pregnant!

I am scared to death!

It was totally unexpected even though I was being dumb, and playing Russian Roulette.

The prescription for my birth control pill had run out a few months ago.

I called to make an appointment with my OB/GYN [obstetrician/gynecologist].

She had moved to Hawaii.

So I found a new one but wasn't able to get in until June.

I figured at my age and my history in difficulty with getting pregnant in the past, I just needed to be careful and I'd be fine. WRONG!

I don't know what I was thinking?

I am 44 years old after all, I should know better.

I have two wonderful boys from a previous marriage.

I've been seeing a wonderful man for nearly three years now.

We both felt we were too old to have children.

I dropped a bomb in the poor man's lap when I told him Saturday night.

This is the last thing either of us wanted, but we decided we would continue with the pregnancy.

I think we will both slowly get used to the idea.

I'm scared to death with all I've read about what can go wrong.

I'm looking forward to reading about all the good and positive about being pregnant at 45 years old.

I'm also looking forward to making some online friends to help each other through this exciting time in our lives.

The Art of Pregnancy After 40: A Personal Journey
by Katka Konecna-Rivera

-- Whether you never considered having children; or time passed while you were having too much fun or working on your career; or you haven't had luck getting pregnant for years; or had children earlier in life and then you decided to have more... you can definitely identify with this book in more ways than one.

The book shall serve as an informal guide to lifestyle, diet, exercise, partnership and pregnancy at this age, offering motivation, inspiration as well as strength.

Filled with practical advice, an inspiring journey, and a wealth of resources, The Art of Pregnancy After 40 will support, nurture, and guide you toward becoming pregnant after 40.

📚 Paperback: 234 pages
Click to order/for more info: The Art of Pregnancy After 40

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About Catherine: I am mom to three grown sons, two grandchildren and two rescue dogs. After years of raising my boys as a single mom, I remarried a wonderful man who had never had a child of his own. Unexpectedly, I found myself pregnant at 49!
Sadly we lost our precious baby at 8 weeks, and decided to try again. Five more losses, turned down for donor egg, foster care and adoption due to my age and losses - we have accepted there will be no more babies in our house.

Find Catherine on Facebook - Follow me on Twitter


  1. It happens! I have started a blog about my pregnancy:

    4 month plus along. Total surprise. Still surprised. I am writing this because I want real women to read a reallife journey of a statistically improbable event.

  2. Anonymous says:

    I'm 45 (46 in July) and have just discovered I'm pregnant. I have 2 girls aged 9 and 7 already and my own business. We hadn't planned this at all and felt sure I wasn't fertile anymore. My 1st was born when I was 36, 2nd at 39 and now there's the possibility that 10 yrs on from my 1st I'm expecting again. I'm in complete shock and haven't fully absorbed it yet. I'm worried about all the scare stories of women my age and am off to see the Dr tomorrow for a consultation.

  3. Unknown says:

    My name is Sue. I'm 6 weeks along at 44. I have two children, a son who is 13 and a daughter who is 11.

    I still can't believe it (I don't know why; I've known about the birds and the bees for many years now..haha). It sounds like a lot of us just thought that after our 30's it's non as likely to happen-- HA! The joke's on us!!

    I'm also nervous about being older and pregnant. I'm self-conscious about other's perceptions toward me, and especially about the safe delivery of my baby and the risks involved.

    But I have to say that I'm really happy about this and see it as a great blessing in our lives. I thought I would never get to hold a new born again or nurse again. I'm trying to be positive and am looking forward to all the beautiful things that come with becoming someone's mom again!

  4. Anonymous says:

    Hey, it can happen!

    I'm 44 and 17 weeks and five days pregnant. All is looking good.

    It's completely natural for women in their 40s to have babies, it's just not usually their first. I've had three miscarriages over the last two years, all before 10 weeks. This will be my first if all continues to go well. My doctor, midwife and all the medical staff in the office are very positive. My husband is 10 years younger and we are thrilled! I did go on chinese herbs and I think that was the key here. No traditional medical intervention, everything happened the old-fashioned way.

  5. Anonymous says:

    I am 45 and just gave birth to my third child, a perfectly healthy baby boy. The challenges to having a child at my age are actually getting pregnant and staying pregnant. The risks of having a healthy child are not nearly as great as everyone thinks. Think positively. As stressful as this experience can be it is all worth it. I now can't imagine life or our family without this little miracle.

  6. Anonymous says:

    I am 43 and just found out I am 8 weeks husband and I are Catholic and stopped birth control 3 years ago. Had been using NFP and trying to be responsible. Last month I decided I would consider an IUD because the risk was getting too scary at this point...but turns out I was already too late:) Over the last 7 days I have been up and down in emotion, terrified of the lifestyle change and the risks associated with having a child at this age. I have two children, 12 and 9. Almost everything I read is negative, and it's quite I was happy to have found a few uplifting stories. We are trying to view this as God's plan and a blessing, but I've also never been so scared. Please continue to post "happy outcome" stories for those of us who are in shock and trying to find posivity! L

  7. Anonymous says:

    Hey all
    I am 44 and pregnant to a FWB. I am Divorced 3 years with 2 adult children. The father a a 24 years old black guy I just meet 3 months ago when I move here. I do not believe in abortions and will take responsibility for my actions. I fear that the father will not. I can't believe that I let this happen to me. I only have myself to blame. We did not use BC, I thought that I would not fall pregnant due to my age and the fact that my ex-husband and I tried for 10 years to have another one but I just did not get pregnant. I will love this baby just as I love my other children. I look forward to caring for it. I am not sure how my friends will react to a biracial baby.

  8. Anonymous says:

    I am 46 years old. I have a 22 year old daughter, a 17 year old son and an 11 year old daughter. I have not confirmed it yet, but, if I am pregnant, I will be happy about it. I have a great grandmother that had her last baby at 47 with no problems whatsoever. I believe, for the most part, it is a myth that it is dangerous to be pregnant over 40. Up until a few years ago, you didn't really hear about women over 40 having babies. I have done a lot of research on my own and have found that it is no more dangerous to become preggers at 46 than it was at 26. There are some things that I must watch for and be careful of, but, I will be just fine if the rabbit dies. I suggest to any woman who is over 40 and thinks she may be pregnant...DON'T PANIC! Kind of like the myth that using tampons at a young age will take away your virginity...pregnancy over 40 is just fine. I'll find out soon!

  9. Anonymous says:

    I am 43, turn 44 next month and just found out i am pregnant. I had a miscarriage five months ago and am just praying i don't suffer another one. I have a 20 yr old and a 12 yr old from a previous marriage. My new partner has no children.

  10. Dorothea says:

    I had a chemical pregnancy about four months months ago and just the very short time I was pregnant was so stressful. I'm 41 and struggle with autoimmune disease, so it's doubly scary. And now I think it's happened again. Seriously, how could I be so dumb? Even after experiencing evidence that I'm still quite capable of conceiving, I wasn't careful enough. I will probably lose it again due to health problems, but if I don't this place might save my sanity with all the stories of normal outcomes after 40. Thanks so much for all the positivity!

  11. Unknown says:

    Hi guys,
    I'm 46 and getting all symptoms of being pregnant again. I have two beautiful daughter 21 and 13. My 21 year old just found out she pregnant so we will be preg the same time. I have the worst pain in my breasts, blue viens popping out everywhere, sick to my stomach! With that being said I'm getting positive tests one day and neg the next then positive again. I was on the pill but definitely not 100%. I also have pernious anemia that I have to give myself a b-12 shot bi- weekly. So confused. My on won't see me till 4 weeks and I'm scared. Thanks guy. Feel free to respond

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